Wednesday, August 26, 2009

You take the good, you take the bad...

You take them both and there you have The Facts of Life.
This isn't a post about 'The Facts of Life'. But it is one of my all time very favorite TV shows. Gosh, how I wanted to be Blair (I've grown up a lot since then!)

No this is a post about taking the good with the bad. Little Miss has a 'best friend', P. I would not choose her as a best friend but I am not 7. She is nice enough, her parents are nice enough. Just not sure how great of an influence they are. Mom (in her 40's) dresses like she is 20 - all the time. Even my husband who is, well, a guy thinks she dresses inappropriately for her age & occupation (SAHM). P, gets her hair highlighted. Dad encourages this all. They really are nice people. It's weird. So we just try to have LM be around her in moderation. And we like her to come to our house. That way we can keep an eye on things. That's the bad.

The good: P gets her hair highlighted and it is always perfectly coiffed. LM often looks like she just rolled out of bed. Even after I have combed her hair. And combed it again. She doesn't like pony tails, braids, headbands, etc. I don't want to push anything so I don't. But the other day she asked me to curl her hair like P's and put it up (pulled up on the sides with the back still long). I got right on that. We have had 3 nights in curlers. Wonder how long it will last?

I got a call from P's mom tonight asking if I had time to talk. Uh-oh. Apparently, P was upset because she and LM got in a 'fight'. Did LM say anything to me? Nope. She came home happy as can be even talking about a playdate w/ P tomorrow. While I am talking to the mom I am thinking that they are getting to the age that they should be able to work things out without us. So I just listen to the mom and apologize for P being upset. Later, I ask LM if there was a problem w/ P that day. "No". After a little prodding the story I get is that P wanted LM to play with her and P's friend Y at lunch but LM didn't want to since Y had been mean to her once. P then told LM that she (P) wouldn't talk to LM if she didn't play with her and Y. Ugh. A totally different story than what P relayed to her mom. I am sure the facts are somewhere in between. NO BIG DEAL. But the mom says to me " I think they need a break from each other". What? Are they dating? Now, P's mom comes to lunch at school almost everyday and I am sure tomorrow will be no different. I am thinking that maybe the mom will try to keep the 2 apart (!) so I told LM that maybe she should sit with her friends H,S, and T tomorrow at lunch. She liked the idea so we'll see what happens.

Is this drama really happening? In 2nd grade? Why don't we just let the kids handle their own friendships instead of micro-managing every detail of their lives? Shouldn't we save our butting-in for the big things? I try, I really do. That's why I just nodded and said mmhhmm alot during the phone call. Like the penguins say on "Madagascar": 'Just nod and smile boys, just nod and smile.' So I do...


Laurie Anne said...

Clearly this mom has a little too much vested in her kid. I'm with you. Kids need to manage their own friends because that is were they learn to deal with real people. Drama is everywhere and the best we can do is help our kids learn to recognize and avoid it :0)

Laurie said...

It's hard, you don't want to see your child hurt, but this does seem like the something the girls can work out on their own. I have learned in the past, that more than likely it is best not to butt in with your kids' small tiffs. They usually seem to work it out in a few seems to escalate if a parent gets involved.
*Always loved the Facts of Life! Thanks for stopping by my blog!:)