The past week has been just too much. Really busy, lots going on here. Some of it good, some not so much. In less than a week I have found out that two friends have passed away.
One was a friend, T, from high school. He was the nicest guy, every one's friend. I never remember him being anything but kind to anyone and he was always fun to be around. A bunch of us had recently reconnected on facebook. He married his high school sweetheart and they were still married, with 2 daughters and a grand daughter. I am not sure how he died although I know he had been in the hospital for a few days and died there. His service was this past Thursday and I am sad to have missed it but it was on the east coast and it just wasn't possible to attend. A group of friends did go and enjoyed catching up with each other but wished that T could have been with them. I found a certain amount of irony in the fact that he died on Valentine's Day, this man who married his high school sweetheart - a love story for the ages.
The other friend, J, was the ex-husband of a very good and old friend, D. D and I have known each other for almost 40 years (can that be possible??) J was another one of those guys, just all around nice. They had been divorced for a few years and unfortunately D was estranged from her parents due to things she had done (the kind of stuff you can't make up) in the family business. They have 3 kids, 2 lived with D, 1 with J. It saddens me that his last years were spent in turmoil (although at 50 who would have thought they would be his last years). J had a heart attack.
I am still trying to process all of this. I cannot fathom losing my husband. I cannot imagine having to pick up the pieces and put on a 'face' for my daughter all while mourning the loss of my partner. Due to the young ages of these men it just hits too close to home. I know as we get older these things will happen more often than they should. I have been truly blessed and fortunate to have had to deal with death so infrequently up until the past few years.
As I try to understand all of this I do know that I will be more appreciative to those around me, be kinder in word, thought and deed and make sure that everyone knows I care. An extra kiss and hug to those I love won't hurt either.
The bitterest tears shed over graves are for the words left unsaid
and deeds left undone.
~Harriet Beecher Stowe